Self Assessment

“Freedom and power bring responsibility.” – Jawaharlal Nehru (15th August, 1947)

When I dive back into time, I remember those speeches made at 8 o clock in the morning, way before the usual first bell. We had to get up really early on every 15th August. We used to have this flag hoisting ceremony along with some speeches and performances. Really boring for a school boy. Not that I did not pay attention. I did listen but then I could not find the difference between them all. The history parts were interesting but then almost all of the rest seemed like a list of do’s and don’ts. As a kid, you never like to be told what you should do, especially early in the morning. Though I am ashamed to admit it, my ultimate aim was the chocolates that were distributed at the end of the ceremony. That was my compensation for getting up early. Then one year a teacher quoted this line from Nehru’s first speech as PM. And something hit my mind. I was too young to understand the entire perception but still I felt I finally knew what freedom is all about. The knowledge gradually expanded with my experience and so did my ideas. And I am still learning it.

“Land of the free” literally means freedom to do anything a person wants to. The only unspoken rule is while you are enjoying your right to be free, do not run over some one else’s. Nothing new, is it? But when we contemplate our daily life, do you think we really have that freedom? Obviously, no. And the reason is that we consider our independence as a moment, a rim between darkness and light, a hurdle which we have crossed. What that speech actually taught me is that freedom is something to be achieved everyday, every moment. 15th August does signify the day when the British left India. Countless people strived for this magical moment. Some of them even laid down their lives knowing that they would not be there to celebrate what they were fighting for. But I am sure they would not have dreamt of India as we are today. Blood was shed for freedom. After 15th August 1947, after we realized our dream of freedom, the situation is not much different. Blood was shed over the last 62 years as well. Till as late as yesterday. We are fighting to save every part of our country. Did I say ‘we’? Apologies for the gross error. Practically only a small part of ‘we’ are really doing the job. Patriotism is not in thoughts, it’s in action. You aren’t great if you think that you are a great patriot and go on littering, polluting, bribing and raping your own country. You aren’t great if you keep thinking about ideas to develop your country and do nothing. You aren’t great if you think that sustaining our independence is duty of a few.

Then some days later I got to read the entire speech somewhere. Another line goes like this “To the people of India, whose representatives we are, we make an appeal to join us with faith and confidence in this great adventure. This is no time for petty and destructive criticism, no time for ill-will or blaming others.” Did you notice something here? If you did not, I will tell you. Though it carried a message of immense wisdom, the speech was made in English. English! I know patriotism is not about your language and attire. But considering the occasion and the part of our population who could not understand English, it would have been much of help had our first prime minister made the speech in Hindi. I do not know what part of our population then did not understand Hindi, but I can bet it would have been much lesser. I have reasons to believe that the message did not reach our people, and they are too obvious. The problem is we do not know what is our own, and that exactly led Nehru to make the I-Day speech in English. Even our first prime minister believed he was formed by our suppressors. I guess even then knowledge of English was symbol of your literacy. And that’s how it has been in India for all these years. Even today, more than 80% of our population does not know English. But that does not mean our literacy rate is at 20%. India has an adult literacy rate of more than 60% now. But that is not enough. The mammoth task which was ahead of us in 1947 still remains as big. There are two Indias – the developed and the developing. The developed India has forgotten that it took birth from the developing India. The developed face of India still remains a handful of people, while rest of them are just termed as the “other India.” Education is definitely the key to development. But above that, we need compassion and understanding to realize that dream of one India, where we remember our roots and keep going back to make sure we have filled all the gaps. What is ours will remain ours.

Freedom comes with responsibility. Responsibility on each one of us to keep us free. So it’s up to us how we treat this responsibility – an asset or liability. There is no shame to accept that India is not developed yet. Actually we are far from there. A country with one of the largest man power is not yet on the list of developed nations. That’s because most of the power is vented through disorganized channels. Pride does not imply winning a cricket match or waging a war on neighboring countries. It goes much deeper than that, deeper into ourselves. It lies in awakening our people to their freedom that they do not know exists. It lies in a balanced progress. Advanced nuclear power technology is of no use if it cannot deliver basic electricity to our villages. Now is a good time to examine who we are and how we got here. Let us be the sun who rises everyday with the same selfless energy to illuminate. Until every single Indian is literate, until every single Indian feels he is really proud of who he is, until every single Indian feels that he is really free, there can be no freedom.

"Freedom is the best heritage to leave behind."

But I must leave....

For one who has taken birth, death is certain and for one who has died, birth is certain.
(Bhagvad Gita, chapter 2, verse 27)

I was listening to this wonderful song by Megadeth - A tout le monde. It is about the emotions riding through the mind of a person who is about to end his life and writing his suicide note. Megadeth, as the greats they always have been, recreated the magic of taking me to the very situation. I could actually feel the goose bumps that a person in the situation would have experienced. And it made me think.

What does a person feel when he knows the next moment would be his last? Or may be his last? A person committing suicide, a convict to be executed or a soldier going for the kill. Death is the common thread between them, though they are in different domains altogether - suicide as escape, gallows as punishment and war as glory. They have to be ready to face death. Although I keep reading about suicides almost every day, I do not know what makes a person to put an end to his own life. The world around seems to be too tough for him. Or maybe he is too embarrassed to face the world, or someone, again. Generally suicide is linked to cowardice. I do not know how true that is but the urge surely has its roots in some fear. Every person has a phobia of one thing or the other. And sometimes, this fear grows to a level where it overshadows other emotions. So the person can think about nothing but the fear. We all have been through such a phase. Even at this level, our mind is sound enough to keep finding a way out. But if this fear continues to grow further, it reaches a point where the mind finds every possible solution insufficient. It kills the other emotions, most importantly, courage. And then it takes the final step. Does a person committing suicide cry? If he does, he knows the value of the life he is wasting – for him and for others. If he does not, he really hates himself. I imagine this transition would not be a pleasant one, as the person would still be confused why he is dying.

A convict could be really guilty. Or not. Or a prisoner of war. But now he has to face execution – hanging, shooting squad, crucifixion, decapitation and so on. Probably he even knows the exact day and time. At this point, I would like to mention a legendry song by Iron Maiden which depicts the same situation (for those who have heard this song, they will know exactly what I am talking about) – Hallowed be thy name. ‘The sands of time for me are running low’. All he can do is count the seconds backwards. Wait for the moment. For him, death is like a truck speeding towards him and he is unable to move. He would be praying for this nightmare to end. He might be afraid, or have prepared himself long time back. He might even be proud of it. A matter of honour for him. Then the d-day comes. Last sunrise. Last look at the world. Last wish. He is treated as a dead man already, long before his execution. Last rites, funeral preparations, mourners – all in front of him. All his beliefs solidify. He either believes in after life or he doesn’t, nothing in between. There is no more confusion. Everything is crystal clear. If he believes in rebirth, he prays for a world that won’t go wrong for him a second time. Then, the signal is given.

The soldier prepares himself, emotionally. It is his job, the ‘call of duty’ as they say. For me, a soldier is the greatest human being. He has left behind everything – his home, his family, his friends and all his earthly possessions. The only thing that drives him is love. Love for his motherland. Love for his people who are very proud of what he is doing. Love for his comrades. But he does not let it ride over him. For he cannot sit and cry over the death of his comrade. That cannot be termed as apathy, but rather a suppression of emotions for a greater cause. He has a mission in hand. He knows the next bullet might have his name on it. He sees death every day. He knows death would be far from pleasant. But he carries on. Because he is there to fight, death is only a side-effect for him. But finally that moment comes when the bullet lodges in his head, he has a last look at the sky, and then closes his eyes. I wonder what thoughts must be going through his mind. Probably he’s thinking about the things he could not accomplish. Or about his family. Or about God. I would never know. But I would call that as an ideal death.

The soul is birthless, eternal, imperishable and timeless and is never terminated when the body is terminated. It is indestructible, incombustible, insoluble and unwitherable.
(Bhagvad Gita, Chapter 2, verse 20, 24)

Death is the biggest mystery the world has ever faced. Countless possibilities have been proposed since long, but they do not provide an answer. For what we know today, death is unknown. And I think it is absolutely bizarre that a person knows he is going to walk right into it. All of us know we are going to die someday. Even then, we are afraid of death. Even then, we continue to live. Natural but strange. Death is natural, but what is strange is that humans have been blessed with a mind that is capable of thinking too much about death - but it will never know what exactly death is.